IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT, YOUR EGO MADE YOU DO IT

Its not your fault, your ego made you do it!

by Ross Bannister Todd (C) 2012 www.ThinkPerfect.com

The way we are raised/trained does not usually give us a full understanding of what living life to the fullest is all about. We usually assume that it means getting people, places, and/or things to make us happy, satisfied, or feel loved.  This often works for a while but usually doesnt last. 

It doesn't last because we are pretending that something outside of us can change how we feel inside of us.  We assume THE OUTER CONTROLS THE INNER the truth is THE INNER CREATES THE OUTER. I realize that may not make sense yet, but keep reading.

HOW YOU FEEL IS NOT controlled by people, places and things but our ego helps us pretend it is.  That new phone isnt making you feel wonderful, its you saying to yourself "this is wonderful" vs when you are at work or school you are saying to yourself "I hate this".  What you are saying/thinking dramatically effects how you feel then with the help of your ego you blame or attribute your discomfort on something outside of you.  What you are not noticing is you [or your ego] decided you don't like what is going on so you resist it and decide: " I don't want to be here". These decisions are causing your discomfort or pain but you don't see that because you are blaming it on something outside of you.  

We often blame/attribute how we feel on something outside of us even if the person or situation is not in front of us anymore we still blame it/them.  How can they make you feel bad if they are not there? The answer is simple: its all coming from your memories/mind and the ego probablytriggered it.  But YOU ARE STILL PRETENDING ITS REAL BUT ITS ALL AN ILLUSION CREATED BY YOUR EGO TO KEEP YOU IN AN UPSET SO IT CAN CONTROL YOU AND STEAL YOUR ENERGY.

Discovering you have an ego is a little like being told you have a tumour, you can't see it so you have no proof it is really there.  So your NEXT STEP is to discover your ego. 

(To discover your ego: see EGO ebook pdf & Practical Enlightenment 800 slides course-click on STORE) 

 The ego is very clever at making itself almost invisible.  You can't see how it is controlling your life untill you first acknowledge you have an ego.  THE EGO IS WHAT IS KEEPING YOU FROM ENJOYING THE FULLNESS OF LIFE. 

It has tricked you into beliving your (ego) thoughts/ voice in your head are you, so it seems invisible.  In other words you are identified with your ego and believe it is you so you don't see it. Nor do you see that it is not the real you.  THE REAL YOU IS THE ONE LISTENING TO THE EGO CHATTER AWAY INSIDE YOUR HEAD.  Since the ego is inside our head we ASSUME it is us so we honor it, obey it and assume it protects us. since everyone else has this going on too it is strange that NOBODY IS TALKING ABOUT THE EGO. The ego will gladly sacrifice your happiness, health, job, money, relationship, even make you sick to survive and stay in control of your life.   

YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS WILL FACILITATE YOU SEEING THE EGO IS NOT YOU BUT YOU HAVE TO MAKE THE EFFORT, WILL IT. 

The ego is very much like a computer VIRUS inside you.  It needs to steal your energy to survive. To do this it needs to get you upset so it creates drama by creating illusions and triggering difficult, painful memories from your past.  It gets away with this because most humans do not question where what they are feeling is coming from, i.e. the present or the past.  If they can feel it they ASSUME it is real.  Memories of feelings feel almost as real as currently being created feelings.   This gives the ego free reign to trick us into believing traumas from our past are going on in the present again.  This creates a false reality that is only going on inside you but we usually assume everyone else feels it too.  We then base decisions and take action based on this false reality, frequently this causes irreparable damage to our relationships and our lives.  In other words we blame someone for our pain and may try to get even but they are innocent, our pain is coming from a memory triggered by out ego.  Often then they get angry and fight back because their ego triggers memories of feelings inside them and they step into their false reality and everything goes downhill from there.  Then we spend weeks...years trying to figure out what happened but it never makes any sense, it can't because it was all an ego illusion.  I will let you in a a little secret: the ego is insane.  Yes, that is the same ego that is running and most likely ruining your life.

Come spend 90 minutes with me and I will show you your ego [and how your mind works] and how to differentiate you/the real you from the ego.  This will give you the key to your ego prison.   It can change your life or you can walk out the door, go back to your life and forget it all with your ego's help very quickly.  The session is a conversation, I will not confront you nor ask you to share your deepest secrets but it is an interactive session not just a lecture  so you will be able to test many of the things I say right there. You will be able to feel the truth in what I am showing you.

Remember fear does not come from outside of you, it is mostly triggered by your ego when IT THINKS/  DECIDES something is dangerous and it is VERY OFTEN WRONG. It can also trigger fear whenever it wants to control you or stop you from doing something like give a speech, sex, meet someone new, or learn about the ego or have a session with me.  The hardest part of a session is getting there, the rest is easy.

THE BATTLE IS WITHIN NOT WITHOUT

The battle is not with the world/others, but rather within ourself, with our mind and ego. The ego makes it look like people/things are doing something to us by triggering feelings from our past and pretending they are coming from outside, from the situation in front of us at the moment, but that is seldom true. But the illusion created by the ego tricks us into blaming others, things, etc. So we try and change others, the world which means we never see the true cause of our problems which is our ego. Blaming others alienates us, destroys our relationships and leaves us loveless and alone. The ego can further confuse us by triggering breathing, blood pressure, make us feel bad, etc problems. Which it again pretends is coming from outside us, from people, places, and things. The ego is blatant, insidious, unrelenting and it thinks we and it are safer with it in control of our life. It also needs energy to survive but the only place it can get that energy from it's host-us. But it must get us to judge, guilt, or shame ourselves before it can steal our chi or energy. The ego often drains our energy to stop is from doing something that it thinks is dangerous, under the pretense of protecting us. But the truth is it is actually protecting itself and it will gladly sacrifice our happiness, health, wellbeing, etc. to insure it's survival. It also doesn't realize it dies if we die, but it will sacrifice our health to make sure it survives. So as you can see the ego is not your friend, but it tells you it is constantly and that you can't survive without it. But in fact like most things the ego says, this IS BACKWARDS. Many people don't survive because the egos plan for us is death. Suicide is caused by ego illusions. Many illnesses are caused by the ego. Our inability to do what we want to do like a healthy life, have sex/gay sex, make money, meet new people, take risks is usually caused by ego blocks. But the root source of our problems is being identified with the ego, believing it is us. Being identified with the ego renders it almost invisible and it likes to keep it that way. OUR PRIMARY BATTLE FOR SURVIVAL IS FOR FREEDOM FROM THE EGO. But in order to start this battle you have to realize that you have an ego parasite inside you that is trying to control your life, to run and ruin it. Symptoms that the ego is in control of your life: you have mostly negative thoughts; you judge, shame and guilt yourself often; you resist your life, your mate, your job, your body, your circumstances; you smoke cigarettes; have very little motivation; take a lot of medicine; DON'T ENJOY THE BEAUTY OF LIFE; see life as something that has to be endured; assume suffering is necessary; BELIEVE SOME PART OF YOU IS BAD. Our true self or feeling consciousness: we are born with a true self that has all the information necessary for us to lead a healthy, happy, abundant, loving and satisfying life. But our parasitic ego rewrites our programming and constantly tries to steer us away from our true self and USURP THE POWER for itself. It does things like replace brotherly love and abundance with greed and lack. IT WILL PUT US TO SLEEP OR MAKE US FEEL ATTACKED WHEN SOMEONE TRIES TO TELL US WE HAVE AND EGO PARASITE INSIDE US. GIVE US A HEADACHE WHEN WE TRY AND READ A BOOK ABOUT EXPANDING OUR CONSCIOUSNESS AWARENESS. MAKE US RESIST ASKING FOR HELP FROM OTHERS OR RECOGNIZING OUR GUIDES. STOP US FROM MEDITATING. MORE INFO AT WWW.THINKPERFECT.COM

INTIMATE SENSUAL SEXUALITY

CONSCIOUS/TANTRA SEX NEW SEX INTIMATE SENSUAL SEXUALITY when sex is sweet, satisfying & exciting it is because intimate sensual sexuality is happening. It is the kind of sex that everybody wants but seldom gets. Intimacy can be with a stranger, friend, lover or mate. Intimacy comes from the mental and the spiritual, not the physical or actual sex. LESS MInd (thinking) AND MORE SPIRITUAL What this means is your sexual sensations and feelings will seem more intense/stronger and not just located in the genitals if you quiet your mind. In addition (like a background) you have the delicious feelings of INTIMACY which are usually missing from western ejaculation sex. Intimacy can have a positive affect on jobs, health and life in general. In a relationship intimacy often changes everything for the better, especially when two people practice sexual intimacy, often. Thinking during sex reduces, a little or a lot, the amount of sensation or feeling you are aware of from the actual act of sexing Then if you are willing and able to have a spiritual connection it AMPLIFIES, DEEPENS, and ENLARGES ORGASM and you feel the effects of the REJUVENATING sexual energy. Ejaculation and orgasm are two separate things that usually happen together but don't have to for you to experience orgasm. Orgasm is spiritual and ejaculation is physical. Ejaculating sperm freely from the penis is very unhealthily and not necessary for orgasm. There are several techniques that can be used to redirect, stop and then pull the energy from the sperm into the body and the mind so you can enjoy multiple orgasms and retain the chi/energy. The sperm energy is some of the most healing, rejuvenating and soothing energy we have especially when it is moved into the body and the mind. Ejaculating often (especially for older men) can drain the body of its life energy, aliveness, mental alertness, and even hasten death. Part I is a free class that explains more in detail and has some techniques that will be demonstrated (clothes on ), Part II is a fee nude seminar where you will practice these techniques and more (part II may be more then one session\meeting. WWW.THINKPERFECT.COM FOR COACHING OPTIONS, CLASSES , ETC.

IF SEX IS NOT FUN

IF SEX IS NO FUN by Ross Bannister Todd assisted by the Helpers If sex is not fun then there may be shame or guilt present in your body/mind. You may still be accepting shame [allowing your ego to shame you] and not realizing that you don't have to do that. It may have become so habitual for you that you don't even see that you are agreeing with it, again. You may have accepted this shame as a given for so long that you don't see that it is NO LONGER TRUE. This may be just one of the untrue emotions that you are keeping alive from your past that are shaping your current reality, your health or how you feel. If sex is bad or dirty (shame) and you do it anyway, it can't be fun, can't be a sensual celebration of your body, genitals, anus, mouth, lips, and spirit. It will tend to lessen or eliminate your orgasms. Some of you because of your up bringing or religion you do not allow yourself to enjoy sex but you still do it, crave it, and most likely suffer guilt after you have had sex, wanted sex, desired sex, or just fantasied about sex. There is nothing dirty about sex unless you believe there is. Sex has been given to us to enjoy, to recharge ourself with the revitalizing energy of sensual sexuality or sex. When two people who love themselves then share their sensual sexuality as an extension of that love with each other, orgasm can then become a gateway to the divine, loving orgasm can be communion with the divine. [this has nothing to do with organized religion] When sensual sexuality is used to make love is restores your chi/energy, heals your body, rejuvenates and refreshes you and gives you a DEEP SENSE OF SATISFACTION and completion. So much so that you may not even want to have or need to have sex again soon. copyright (C) by Ross Todd December 1, 2011 all right reserved

Bigger, better orgasms and Tantra or just sex

MORE FULFILLING SEXUAL EXPERIENCE
by Ross Bannister Todd
January 11, 2011

Who doesn't want a more fulfilling sexual experience? Most people believe that the problem is their sex partner not being "something" enough. They don't see that judging is a mental activity and all mental competes with or blocks you fully experiencing your physical senses. In other words: WHILE YOU ARE THINKING YOU CAN'T FEEL AS MUCH. Judging, guilt, shame, fantasy is all thinking which reduces your sensual experience or what the sex feels like.

In addition a noisy mind (thinking) reduces the size and duration of orgasm. Orgasm is the spiritual component of physical ejaculation (both male and female). For example if you meditate and therefore know how to quiet your "chatter/ego" mind and do that during sex, you will have bigger orgasms. If you also learn how to have an orgasm without ejaculation, you can have multiple orgasms (men too). Because you do not expend/drain all your energy ejaculating. Yes, bigger orgasms are possible without ejaculation. Ejaculation not only drains your energy but is unhealthy especially for older men.

Orgasms are further improved by establishing a spiritual connection with your partner. This again requires a quiet mind and the ability to focus almost completely on your sensual experience without having chatter/thoughts in your head. It is also important to let go of waiting for your climax (ejaculation). You need to forget about climax and be completely in the present, fully accepting and therefore enjoying the present experience.

Tantra techniques are frequently used to facilitate the results listed above. It is not necessary to practice Tantra to use the techniques to improve your sex life.

TRUE LOVE
There is another level to sexual enjoyment and that is when it is used as an expression of love. However, the love does not come from the sexual experience itself, it comes from the people and their willingness to love, be loving, express love, and experience love. However, this is not conditional ego "love" which is not true love and in fact is usually only lust gift wrapped and labeled love. True love requires an understanding of responsibility, the responsibility that you are the source of your love not another, not someone outside of your body. You cannot "get love" from another you can only allow it to come from deep inside you into your experience. But we humans usually then attribute this experience of love to the person, place or thing in front of us. Which the perpetuates the myth that love comes from outside us.

When one is experiencing love and another person is experiencing love (strangers or mates) and they get together and share love it expands. If they do this while having sex it can become a gateway to the divine. This is a lot of what the purpose of Tantra is about. This is where orgasm can last much longer then minutes and it can also be a full body experience not just localized in the genitals.
For more information please see www.think perfect.com or contact Ross Bannister Todd at tantrasexcoach@gmail.com

sex sex sex sex

by Ross Bannister Todd

www.ThinkPerfect.com

Sex is deeply embedded in our culture, not just the act of having sex but a lot goes in to what happens before sex.

We go to the gym to have a great body, we buy clothes that either show off our body or hide it, we groom it, pay the plastic surgeon to change things, do diets, hair cuts, hair removal, etc, this all has to do with looking good and looking attractive so we can attract a mate and or sex.

Many people only have friends that look like people they are attracted to, they don't even socialize with people that do not appear attractive to them.

For some people the chase is all there is. It motivates their entire life, yet some of these same people may not even admit this to themselves, or to anyone else. they are in denial about their motivation, they may even talk down sex, are sexaphobic or homophobic. Many homosexuals are homophobic because that is what the culture has taught them and they haven't seen through it yet.

We need sexual energy, it is an integral part of our life force. When we put it down, dislike it, make it wrong we are actually crippling ourselves. There is NOTHING BAD WITH OR ABOUT SEX.

Unless you are projecting your negative, judgmental energy onto sex and pretending that dark energy is coming from sex. Loving sex is rejuvenating, uplifting, energizing, orgasmic and healing. Unless you are guilting or judging yourself while you are having or after you have just had sex, which then taints your experience, makes sex unhealthy, changes the energy of sex and CAUSES disease. guilt puts holes in your immune system that allows disease to enter. It is not the sex that is dirty it is your thoughts, your mind, your intentions, what you are projecting onto sex.

People that have no guilt about sex seldom get any kind of sexual disease, even when they have sex with someone that has something.

'WE COME FROM SEX" as Osho point out in his book"SEX MATTERS". Our culture/society in the USA says that SEX IS BAD. If you believe something is bad and you do it anyway, it will make you sick. If you take a pill and believe it is bad, it will make you sick. Take the same pill and believe, trust, decide it is good for you and it will not make you sick. I have taught this to many clients who were getting sick from their HIV meds. As soon as they really decided their medicine was good, ok, was NOT poison they stopped getting sick in most cases.

Next time we ill look more at the role of Tantra and non-mental sex.

Love yourself first because if you don't you can't give love to anyone else - its not selfish your body needs it to be healthy.

check out my website www.ThinkPerfect.com

GREAT SEX

So lets give this a test drive:
Great sex starts by realizing that the mind: thinking, thoughts, fantasy, fears, guilt, judgments, all inhibit sex a little or a lot. E. D. is first about thinking instead of paying attention to what you are actually engaged in/doing.

Tantra techniques are designed to quiet the mind first then turn up the sexual energy.
Since you [men and women] don't have to ejaculate to have an orgasm, Tantra is focused on orgasm not ejaculation. There is no ejaculation in formal Tantra and there is a full body orgasmic experience that grows over time.

Out of battery power
As God says in CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD BOOK
"Sex, yes I invented it please enjoy it often".